In the end, Kanade stayed in my room for about an hour, relaxing before she hurriedly went home.
I told her I would walk her back since it was getting dark, but she refused, saying she would be fine.
From the bottom of my heart, I thought it was truly dangerous for her, so I tried to insist a few times, but...
"It's okay. There's a radio program I want to listen to on the way back."
...I didn't quite understand, but it seemed I was rejected based on Kanade's own priorities, so I reluctantly accepted it.
After Kanade left, I returned to my room alone. I wondered if I should prepare dinner, but I wasn't very hungry, so I decided against it.
"...Kanade has really become beautiful."
Instead, I sat at my desk, locked my hands behind my head, and muttered those idle thoughts.
...Since the day I saw her off at the airport, I hadn't been able to get in touch with her at all.
I studied French and planned to go to a university over there during the entrance exam season to look for her... but in the back of my mind, I believed I would never see her again.
Now that I had reunited with someone I thought I'd never see again, my feelings were... complicated.
It wasn't that I wasn't happy. Of course I was.
...But the feeling that was currently growing the most inside me was a sense of helplessness.
"In the end, I still couldn't do anything for her."
Years ago, before I saw Kanade off on her journey, I was still young, stupid, and a coward.
Even though my parents had arranged a weekly meeting with Kanade for my sake, I couldn't say I made the most of it. When I saw Kanade dying before my eyes, all I could do was wail.
...Kanade said that my existence became her motivation to live, but that was surely just her trying her best to make me feel better.
That's why... that's why I'm probably feeling so much pain right now.
"...Time to study."
Well, no matter how much I worry or lament my own helplessness, nothing will get better.
Just as Kanade's condition didn't improve no matter how much I cried out.
Just as Kanade's body grew weaker no matter how much I encouraged her.
Just as Kanade didn't get well no matter how much I comforted her.
...I realized through experience that if I don't want to stay in the status quo, I have no choice but to move forward myself.
So, instead of worrying or lamenting my weakness... I will spare no effort and achieve results as soon as possible.
I have no choice but to turn my past failures into a defiant spirit and grow stronger.
I have a dream.
Because I felt my own helplessness and thought I had lost a friend... no, someone precious to me on that day I parted with Kanade, I have a goal I want to reach.
"...This time, I want to be able to save someone."
My dream for the future was to become a doctor.
I was done with cursing my own helplessness like I did that day.
Not wailing, not encouraging, not comforting...
This time, I wanted to save the person precious to me directly with my own hands.
I devoted myself to my studies, solving problems in the reference book spread out on my desk.
I wonder how long I had been studying like that.
I didn't know the exact time, but because I had been facing the desk in the same posture for so long, my muscles felt stiff.
"...I'm tired."
The moment I stretched my back and said that, my arm hit my eraser, and it tumbled onto the flooring.
After letting out a sigh, I peeked under the desk to pick up the eraser.
"...Huh?"
Whether that act was a misfortune or not...
"...Did I plug an AC adapter in a place like this?"
I noticed an unfamiliar AC adapter plugged into the outlet deep behind the study desk.
The AC adapter was the type with only one port for a USB cable.
...Did I plug an AC adapter here a long time ago for charging my phone and just completely forgot about its existence?
No, but I intentionally pulled an extension cord onto the desk for that.
...Besides, this AC adapter doesn't have a single speck of dust on it. It looks brand new.
"...Ah, I see."
It clicked.
"Kanade must have left it behind."
...Haha. She has an unexpectedly clumsy side, doesn't she? I gave a wry smile and put the AC adapter in my bag. I figured I would tell her tomorrow that she forgot something and give it back.
...School, huh.
Leaving aside after school, many classmates had gathered around Kanade all day today.
It was only natural.
Kanade is cute, sociable, and kind...
...Tomorrow will surely be the same scene as today.
"...I hope what happened after school today doesn't leave any bad blood."
Naturally, that wish of mine was not to be granted.