* * *
Riding the train in the opposite direction from Konuma and Sakohasu, I put on my earphones.
What I play, of course, is Amane's new song that we just recorded.
Seeing my thumb trembling slightly as I try to tap the screen, I scoff at myself. I'm way too nervous...
But well, I guess that makes sense.
After all, writing the continuation of the lyrics for this song means putting my own hands into an amane song.
Based on my feelings up until now, it feels like "stepping into a sanctuary." ...Actually, even with my feelings right now, that's still what it feels like.
It is, naturally, very scary.
But I have to overcome this. If I don't, I won't be able to let the band 'amane' make their debut.
To be honest, I still don't understand why Manager Ariga only acknowledges 'Kyousou,' or if there really is no point in forming a band if we're just believers.
Even so, for now, "a fool's deliberation is as good as idleness."
Someone who knows which way is forward but doesn't move is just an idiot.
And, though it's strange since I understand so little, the goal for these lyrics is clear.
It is for me to acknowledge that "it's okay to release this to the world as amane's lyrics." If I can do that, it will surely be a success.
I shouldn't be the one saying it, but I think I'm quite strict when it comes to Amane's words. Yeah, I really shouldn't be the one saying that...
While thinking about such things and playing the recording over and over again, I arrived home in no time.
"I'm home—"
There is no reply. Whether someone is there or not, greetings are important. After washing my hands and gargling, I sit on my bed.
Today's song by Amane only goes up to the first verse, and the chorus is just "Lalala," so the lyrics weren't that long to begin with.
I've already soaked them into my head to the point where I can recite them by heart.
"Alright, shall I try transcribing them..."
With that, I typed them into my smartphone while singing along.
* * *
If yesterday didn't exist, and today was the first day
Would I have chosen the same tomorrow?
Maybe, like the Earth doing a somersault
The scenery might have shifted a few millimeters, fatally.
An answer sheet that should have been perfect
A blank space that appeared on the back before I knew it
For the first time, I don't know the words that should fill it
I won't say "tell me," but
Lalalalala...
* * *
I stare intently at the string of characters.
I think it's a good song, and I think the lyrics are good.
I felt that the lyrics were a bit more abstract than Amane's usual style. Being able to write something like this too, she's really a formidable opponent...
Hmm, what part of this should I even deny?
...No, nobody said I had to deny anything.
What should I do to make it even better? That's what it's about.
...Like I said, that's exactly what I don't know...
My brain repeats a typical internal monologue.
"Whew..."
It can't be helped.
It might be tactless, but I'll try to carefully decipher it line by line.
『If yesterday didn't exist, and today was the first day / Would I have chosen the same tomorrow?』
What does "up until yesterday" refer to?
For example, if she hadn't met Konuma, if she hadn't met me or Sakohasu, if she hadn't entered Musashino International, if she hadn't met Manager Ariga... and, if she hadn't debuted as amane.
Even in such a world line, would tomorrow be the same? Is that what she means?
『Maybe, like the Earth doing a somersault / The scenery might have shifted a few millimeters, fatally.』
If so, then here, she probably wants to say that "tomorrow" would have been as slight as a parallel world, yet fatally different.
Even if the Earth did a somersault, it would probably end up in almost the same place, but surely that shift of a few millimeters might have a huge impact.
...Would it? Without amane... would Konuma and Amane have been brought together? If not...
...No, there's no point in thinking about that anymore.
Because if there was no amane, even I wouldn't have met Konuma. I wouldn't have come to Musashino International, and even if I did, I would have had no contact with Konuma.
...Well, it's probably not zero.
Ah, how pathetic of me to be so indecisive! I'm supposed to be wishing for their future.
I shake my head to clear my distractions and read on.
『An answer sheet that should have been perfect』
Using this kind of metaphor feels unusual for her this time.
It's probably talking about Amane's perfect life.
A life that was supposed to have no mistakes and nothing she couldn't do.
『A blank space that appeared on the back before I knew it』
However, in a place she couldn't see until now, in a place she hadn't noticed until now, there were things she didn't know.
That is surely a world that became visible precisely because she found precious existences other than herself.
『For the first time, I don't know the words that should fill it』
She learned of the existence of an answer she couldn't derive on her own.
She is bewildered by a margin that could be called a defect born for the first time in a life that had been sailing smoothly—something frightening, yet slightly exciting.
...I might be starting to understand.
『I won't say "tell me," but』
Amane wants to fill that blank space.
But she doesn't know how by herself. Yet, it's not that she wants to be told.
It's not that she wants to be given the answer and fill it in herself.
And finally, I realize.
『Lalalalala...』
"I see, this part wasn't just a simple 'Lalala'..."
I don't know if it came from Amane's deep psyche or if she did it intentionally.
But the chorus of this song could only be "Lalala" right now.
In other words.
The chorus of this song, sung as "Lalala," was the "blank space" itself.
The blank space she couldn't fill by herself. The lyrics she couldn't write. The unfinished melody.
Amane surely wanted to fill it with the band 'amane.'
"What..."
Of course.
How did I not notice something so simple?
How did I not notice such a straightforward feeling?
"Amane wanted to make the song together..."
Once put into words, it's such an obvious thing that it doesn't even qualify as a discovery.
Even something like that, I couldn't see.
Without any malice or awareness, I was thinking in terms of "Amane" or "Me and Konuma."
The one who worshiped Amane without permission, held fantasies without permission, separated her into a different dimension without permission, distanced her without permission, and built her up as a solitary genius was none other than myself.
"Of course we wouldn't be recognized as a band..."
I'm an idiot. It's frustrating. It's miserable. It's embarrassing.
I bite my lower lip. Damn, it hurts.
First, I delete the characters I typed as "Lalalalala..."
Then, I type new lyrics into the margin that was created there.
Even if my movements are rough, the words are careful.
Firmly, as if filling in a blank space.
I wonder why, but I feel like I'm going to cry.
But that's exactly why.
『If yesterday didn't exist, and today was the first day / Would I have chosen the same tomorrow?』
Amane, the answer is this.
* * *
We can't let yesterday disappear
I can't cry today
Because this is the path I decided myself
So
Even if everything up until yesterday is pitch black
Let's choose the first step together today
Because tomorrow belongs to us
* * *
"I did it..."
Wanting to share it as soon as possible, I called that guy.
Listening to the ringing from the smartphone speaker, my excitement becomes unstoppable.
The rest of the continuation... I'll make it to match the melody that guy has surely created, having awakened by now without any basis.
Then, after once everything is finished, the four of us will check it again.
Surely we'll each have our own thoughts, worry, think, and fight.
By doing that, finally.
The co-creation of the four of us begins.
* * *