It was just as Taira-chan said.
The thoughts and emotions that had been somewhat suppressed while talking to her came flooding back with a thick, sludgy viscosity the moment I was alone.
The time of day probably didn't help either.
Normally, Ichikawa's conversation with Tokugawa-san would have ended by now; it wouldn't be strange if they had already parted ways.
However, I hadn't received any word from Ichikawa—not that I expected any to begin with—and I remained in the dark about the "result" of that conversation.
Maybe, right about now... how should I put it... something happened between them, or something.
No, like I said, it has nothing to do with me. Even as I tried to tell myself that, it was meaningless now. It might be none of my business, but I clearly wasn't indifferent.
I recalled what Taira-chan told me. If the opposite of "love" is "indifference," then what is the opposite of "indifference"...?
While taking in such poetic questions, something pitch black coiled around my head and chest. Neither the scenery of the Chuo Line nor the Musashino Line felt refreshing or sentimental at all.
While clutching that state of agony, I managed to reach home, immediately locked myself in my room, and lay down on my bed.
Of course, I didn't say "I'm home," but no voice came to scold me for it. Unusually, I seemed to have returned before Yuzu. ...Probably because I came straight home without doing any club activities or anything else.
I picked up the guitar that was within reach of my gaze.
I idly strummed a C chord, but even that resonance only served to stir up the unrest in my heart.
They say that "any emotion can be released if you turn it into music," but I realized that was a lie. When your feelings are a mess, the noise is too loud to find the sound you want to make.
If I desperately recalled these feelings once things settled down and spun them into sound, would they become something "real"...?
"Damn it..."
Despite feeling sleepy, I couldn't drift off even if I closed my eyes. I shook the bed with my restless legs and tossed and turned, rolling around as if I were half-writhing in agony.
"I'm home—"
I heard the sound of my younger sister entering the house.
"Hm, Takkun's shoes."
It seemed she noticed my shoes were in the entryway.
Wait, Yuzu, you say "I'm home" even when you're coming back to an empty house...?
"Takkun—? Are you back...?"
The door to my room clicked open. A faint light leaked in from the hallway.
"Whoa, it's pitch black in here... Eh, are you not here...?"
"I'm here."
"Hyah!?"
Yuzu nearly fell over in shock as I sat up abruptly.
"If you're here, say something...!"
"I'm here, so I said I'm here."
"...Aren't you ashamed to say that?"
"Well..."
Even I was a bit appalled by myself.
"What's wrong, sitting in a pitch-black room like this?"
"No, nothing really..."
Even if I told Yuzu, she wouldn't understand. Or rather, I hadn't sorted it out myself yet.
"Hmm... Did you have a fight with someone?"
"...Not really."
As she hit the bullseye, I plopped back down. Yuzu gently sat on the edge of the bed.
"Look at you, becoming quite the normie before I knew it."
"Normie...?"
Where is the "real life fulfillment" in this? I've been sulking in my room since the evening.
"You can't have a fight alone. I mean, look, originally Takkun only had Sako-chan to fight with.”
"...Shut up."
"Hey, don't take it out on Yuzu. So, why did you fight? Didn't you say something unnecessary, Takkun?"
"...I did."
"You actually did?"
Yuzu gave a wry smile while retorting.
"Then, Takkun, you have to apologize."
"...I don't know what to apologize for, or how."
"Wow, this high school sophomore is such a kid..."
She was looking at me with great disdain...
"Can't you just say 'Sorry for saying something unnecessary' normally?"
"I don't know why I said it, and I'm not even sure if it really was unnecessary. I feel like if I apologize without understanding, the same thing will happen again immediately."
"Hahaha... Takkun, you're needlessly serious as always..."
Even though she's my sister, she spoke in a gentle voice, "Well, it's also one of your good points," wrapping her words softly.
"But you know, Takkun."
"Yes..."
"With your head, you'll probably never understand no matter how much you think about it alone."
"Is that so...?"
Yuzu didn't answer that question; she stood up from the bed with a bounce.
"Want to eat?"
"...No."
"Fine. Do as you like. Yuzu's only making enough for herself then—"
Yuzu waved her hand flippantly and left the room.
"...Well, I guess it's fine to keep worrying until you understand that you don't understand."
Still, why does she say such enlightened things sometimes...?
The next day.
I thought about it all night, but just as Yuzu predicted, I didn't find an answer at all. I headed to school, dragging my sleepiness along.
With my eyes half-closed, I entered the classroom just as the morning bell rang, and homeroom began immediately.
Glancing at the window seat, Ichikawa was looking outside with her chin in her hands, her back turned to me.
I let out a sigh so quiet no one would notice and slumped onto my desk, hoping to ease even a little of my sleepiness. The short homeroom ended quickly with just a few announcements.
Just as I was thinking I had to lift my head and head to the first period...
A voice came from above me.
"Konuma-kun, the dark circles under your eyes are incredible, you know?"
I sat up abruptly at that voice, and there I saw...
"Did you think it was Amane-chan? Too bad! It was Erina!"
A little devil was standing there with a mean, grinning smile.
"Sigh..."
I let out a deep sigh and slumped onto my desk again. Lately, everyone's impressions of each other have been spot on...
It seemed Erina-san had crouched down so her face was level with my desk. She spoke to me in a whisper.
"You look way too disappointed. Uri uri—"
She poked my head repeatedly.
"It's nothing..."
A raspy voice came out. Come to think of it, this was the first time I'd spoken today...
"Why don't you guys just make up?"
Erina-san spoke kindly. Or rather...
"...How?"
How on earth did Erina-san find out about the situation too...?
"Geez."
Erina-san exhaled as if exasperated. There was that sweet, citrusy scent again.
"It's because those dark circles under your eyes match a certain someone else's!"